Always Check Your Work (Order)

In news of "this is why you always read the estimate before authorizing the work"...

During the middle of May, we went to Vegas for a ten-day trip to take in a three-day EDM festival plus related shows before and after the festival. While we were gone, the DC area got stupid amounts of rain. In one 24-hour period we got 7" of rain and in a further 48 hours, the three-day rain total went up to 11". So, when I came home and my wife's car was poppping alerts, I wasn't super surprised. Even though the car was street-parked on a hill — such that there was no possibility of it actually getting flooded — it was still a lot of rain. That volume of rain often finds ways to get into vehicles that are parked for the duration.

What I was surprised by was when, on our way to replenish our vacation-bare refrigerator, the car completely quit. First the A/C fan cut out. Then alerts for the power steering, brake-assist, AWD, throttle, etc. all popped. As I limped the car to a safe pull-off — a semi-vacant strip-mall — the alerts went away ...because the electrics completely quit, taking the instrument panel with them.

I called the dealership where we got the car. When I'd bought the car, I'd paid the extra $3K for the extended warranty. They gave me the number for a towing-company they work with. I called the towing-company. When the dispatched driver called to say he was five minutes out, I called Uber. While the tow-man rigged our car up onto the flat-bed, we caught the Uber over to the dealership. This was two Saturdays ago, now.

Dealership gave us a loaner and, because it was a holiday weekend, told us it would probably be Tuesday before they'd have a chance to look at it. Tuesday came and went and no call from the dealership's service department. First thing Wednesday, I called to find out where the fuck the estimate for my car was. Around lunchtime, they mailed me the estimate. The total expected repairs were expected to come to a little over $4,000: alternator, serpentine belt, front-struts, alignment and battery ...nearly 75% of that total was the estimated labor cost.

I replied back to the email with commentary:

• "That's a brand new battery: it shoul accept a charge just fine. If it needs to be replaced already, I'll need to smack another garage around for this part of the repair costs."
• "I bought the warranty-extension to cover the mechanicals through 6yr/60,000. The car is less than six years old and has less than 45,000 miles on it. Losing an alternator at this point in time seems really premature - almost as premature as the warranty-covered loss of the clutch at 33,000 miles. Are you telling me that none of this is covered?"

So, the service representative said he'd check on the warranty-coverage. Meanwhile I'm thinking, "you presented me an estimate for $4,000 and you didn't even bother to see if the warranty I bought through you guys covered anything??"

Two days pass and I don't hear anything further from the dealership. I decide, "fuck this waiting," and call back to ask the status. "My" service-lead had apparently gone on vacation and hadn't passed the ticket down. They assigned me a new lead. We went over the estimate on the phone, and, again, I had to bring up the warranty. Again I was informed that they needed to contact the warranty guarantor.

Another couple days pass and it's now Friday with no word back. So, I call for another status check. I'm told they're still waiting on the guarantor. I note that I'll call again, Monday afternoon, if I don't hear back from them. I didn't hear back from them by lunchtime, so I called (at 13:30 - no point calling during lunch-hour). This time I'm told that the guarantor's adjuster is due to arrive any time, now, to check/ok the work. They'll get me an updated estimate depending on the adjuster's findings.

They actually did call me a little before 16:00. Even better, not only was the $1000 associated with the alternator parts-and-labor covered, so to was all the other stuff (with the exception of the warranty deductible and the cost of the wheel alignment). In short, my $4,000+ initial estimate drops to a little less than a $300 outlay. And, about that I'm happy.

The thing that gets me is, had I not pushed back, I'd have been on the hook for $4,000+ worth of repairs. Why the hell wouldn't they just automatically do right by me? Why the hell did I have to push to get what was due me from the warranty? I mean, had I not pushed for them to verify the coverage, I'd have essentially paid for the repairs twice: once for the unused warranty and once for the repairs themselves. 

Further aggravating is that it's been nearly ten days to get to this point. Granted, they'd given me a loaner, so I didn't have to rent a car during the period nor strand my wife while I worked had I not been able to afford to rent one. But it's still annoying to be stuck in a loaner for that long. Don't get me wrong, the loaner isn't shitty, but it's definitely the base-model ...and our car very much is not.

Monsoons an Christmas Lights

It appears that neither of our cars much cared for the 7" of rain in 24 hours and 11" of rain over a three-day period during our ten-day trip to Vegas.

As expected with my sixteen and a half year old convertible, I found water in the spare-well under the cargo-deck of my trunk. Fact of convertible-owning life is that, as they age, they start to leak. Still the amount I found pooled under the spare tire was far less than I'd feared. There was less than half an inch of standing-water at the deepest part of the puddle as my car sat parked on our moderately up-sloped driveway. Only really concerning thing is that, when I put the key in the ignition, the ABS and DSC warning lights were both lit. Drove the car around the block to make sure that the brakes were actually working. So, it seems either the sensors are moisture-damaged or just still wet.

The bigger surprise was my wife's Mini. It will be six years old this coming December. When we started it up, yesterday, it was complaining that it was unable to charge the battery. At the time this error came up, the local service-facility we use was closed for the day (well, their electrical tech was gone for the day).We were going to drive it to the shop, today, if the indicator stayed on. Came out after returning from morning errands to find that the alert was no longer showing. So, we opted to drive it to the grocery store on a route that would take us closish to where we get it service figuring "if the alert returns, we'll just head to the service facility". As we left the neighborhood, the first sign of trouble popped up: A/C fan decided "I'm not actually going to stay running at 'high'; I'll run at 'low' and indicate that I'm running at 'high'." Not a fatal issue, and far less worrying than the "not able to charge" alert of the previous day. Drove onwards to see if the problem would clear itself. As we approached the end of a lengthy downhill stretch of road, first one error cropped up, then another. Lost the power-assist on the steering. Then the ABS indicator lit. Then the AWD indicator lit. Then the DSC indicator lit. Then the throttle stopped responding. Was able to get the car off the road using the engine's idle-throttle power. Got it up a very slight grade and into a little shopping plaza's parking lot. As we were rolling to a stop, the instrument cluster winked out.


Once parked, I got out my phone to call the service-facility. They gave us the number of a towing-company to call. Called the tow-company and they estimated a 60-90 minute response. The car was becoming quite warm and stuffy as it sat A/C-less on the open parking lot in the 90° heat and 78% humidity. I decided to see if the windows were at least working. Naturally, they were also stricken. So, we opened all the doors to get some airflow. Noticed there was a McD's in the plaza and opted to seek shelter from the heat in there while we waited for the tow to arrive.


A couple minutes after placing our order for drinks and sitting down, the driver of the tow-truck called to verify our location and let us know he was about five minutes out. Not bad: maybe fifteen minutes from call to arrival when we were originally told 60-90. As he was prepping the Mini to go up on the flat-bed, I called Uber. The driver arrived just as the driver was readying to put the flatbed into its "ready to drive" position. We got to the service-center about ten minutes before our Mini did. By the time the tow-truck driver had offloaded it and turned it over to the service-center, we had the paperwork for our loaner-car in hand. Presumably, we'll know around lunchtime Tuesday what's up with the car. Really hoping it's just a "needs to dry out" situation and not a "need to completely overhaul the primary electrical bus" kind of situation.

C'mon to the 21st Century, Citi

So, recently, I opted to apply for an airline rewards card issued through Citibank. It's been... "interesting," thus far.

For starters, when I followed the application-link that came from my preferred airline, it took me to a Citi-hosted web page. The page itself wouldn't render in any of my normal browsers. I had to switch to a browser with all privacy-plugins deactivated and with most in-built security-settings disabled. Yeah. Good start.

Once I was able to actually login and fill out the form, I received a "thanks: we'll have our decision to you within 7-10 business days" exit-page. Seven to ten days??? For the past several years would-be providers of revolving-credit services have typically been able to make their decisions in less than 7-10 munutes. Why the fuck does Citi take days to do things everyone else takes minutes to do. I mean, that's several orders of magnitude to make the same kind of decision. It's not like they were offering me an outsized line of credit, either. Hell... the companies that provided my my solar loans only took a few minutes to generate their approvals. So, again, "WTF, Citi?"

When I'd applied for the card, I'd assumed I'd have it in hand for my trip to Vegas. Between the protracted decision-making time and the fact that they USPSed the card to me (again, Citi, "WTF: everyone else does this shit via FedEx or 2nd-day USPS because they want to start earning money off me - why you delivering the card via standard ground mail??"), I did not have the card in hand for that trip. Citi coulda made fees on ten days worth of hotel accommodations, several very nice restaurant tabs, quite a few bar tabs not to mention all the Uber rides and concert merchandise. But, nope, they had to be slow.

At any rate, we got home from Vegas and found the new card waiting in the stack of mail our pet-sitter had brought inside for us. I got the new card out of its envelope and activated it via Citi's card-activation portal. I set up all my profile information. I set up my security-verification questions and answers, various pins and other secondary authenticators. And, because I prefer to use my phone - rather than physical cards - I installed their e-wallet. I'd have just used my regular e-wallet, but Citi apparently thinks that only their e-wallet will do (presumably, they don't want to split fee-making opportunities with other e-wallet services), so, "whatever".

Once I'm outside the card's trial period (during which I earn the airline's mileage bonus), I'll probably revert to using my regular card(s). Those cards work with my preferred e-wallet and are just generally better service providers.

At any rate, today was the first farmers market we could hit since getting back from Vegas. It was a "refill the pantry" kind of trip. I figured, "use the new card and start knocking out my obligation towards getting the airline reward." Used the card with eight different vendors with no problems. Got to the last vendor we were going to hit, and my card was declined. Pop open Citi's e-wallet and it tells me "security-hold placed on card: please contact this number."

With much annoyance, I hit the number in the app. It rings through and puts me into their customer service call-tree. First thing it asks for, before routing me, is my credit card number. All I can think is, "seriously? I called from your fucking app and it couldn't have put me into your routing system with that information already populated?" So, I punch in my card number. I then answer the first security question (c'mon, guys, I've got an authenticated device on my person - why aren't you leveraging that capability). I'm then placed on hold while a represetative becomes available. Five minutes pass and eventually a CSR picks up the line.

First thing they ask for is my card number. I point out to them that me reading my card and CCV number out in a public place kind of defeats the purpose of calling in to verify my card's security. They audibly shrug and ask for both bits of info. I supply them. They then ask for further authenticators. I again preface my reply with commentary about the wisdom of being asked for this while I'm in a public place surrounded by randos. Now that I'm sufficiently authenticated, the CSR says that he has to forward me to the correct department.

Mmmmmkay... So, your app had me dial a number that wasn't even the correct department and before you could decide I needed to be routed to a different department, you had to authenticate me?

First CSR does a warm hand-off to the next CSR. Next CSR is apparently wrapped in cotton batting because I could barely fucking hear her. I ask her adjust her volume since my phone's maxed, I'm in a noisy place and she's barely audible. She does so. Once we're able to hear each other ...she asks for my account and CCV numbers. I don't bother to point out the stupidity of having to do so since she was getting me via a warm-handoff from someone that had already collected that information. I don't bother to point out the stupidity of having to audibly dictate that information (again) in a public place. She brings up my information an realizes that she needs to hand me off to yet a third representative.

Second CSR does a warm hand-off to third CSR. If you guessed that the third CSR needed me to dictate my card and CCV numbers, you'd be correct. Further, this CSR needed to send me an SMS to further verify me. Unfortunately, apparently Citi's SMS system doesn't think that my phone number is a valid phone number. So, she can't adequately authenticate me (???) via that method. Fortunately, since I'd set up a bunch of secondary authentication methods when I activated my account, she was able to verify me using one of the yet-to-be-used ones. She then informs me that they need to ground-mail me a paper form that I need to fill out and ground-mail back to them before they can unlock my card. Incredulous, I ask, "why did you issue me a card and provide an online activation mechanism if that wasn't going to be sufficient to actually use my card ...and why did you let me make eight charges before deciding 'whoa, that's enough, there, buddy!'?" She says she's sorry for the situation but she's bound by policy. I note to her that I will be contacting my airline and probably canceling the card once I've claimed my reward. She again states she's sorry that I feel the service has been inadequate and to look for the form in the mail.

Hoorary for quality customer service. Hooray for great security procedures.

Eventually, we complete our errands — doing the remaining transactions with one of my less asstacular credit cards — and return home. After unpacking everything and settling in, I get out my laptop an visit Citi's website. After logging in, it tells me "card is on security-hold, pleas call...". I figure, "worth a shot: maybe they can at least explain this morning's debacle." So, I pick up my VOIP phone and dial the number.

This time, no call-tree an no waiting on hold. Explain basic situation to CSR. He asks for my secondary authenticators so he can open my record. He then asks for my cell number so he can send me a one-time authenticator-number ...their system still thinks my number is invalid. So, he calls me on my number. He rings through, verifying that the number on my account is valid. He updates the information in my account to that effect. Now able to get into the particulars of why my account got put on hold, he notes that they were supposedly not able to validate my SSN. I can only express minor incredulity — "why would you issue a card if there was a problem with my SSN that wouldn't allow me to use my card." He reads to me what they have on file and I validate that the information is correct. This time, his system is able to validate my SSN (where it couldn't previously for whatever fucking reason). He indicates that with things validated, he can remove the hold and that there's no further need for an exchange of ground-service paper-based mails.

While I'm thankful that things are resolved, I ask him why there was so much of a runaround, previously. Obviously, he couldn't really provide an answer to that beyond, "I honestly don't know." I think him for his assistance and we conclude the call. Regardless, I'm obviously sub-impressed with Citi's policies, procedures and IT back-end.

Seriously: if this were 1998 or maybe even 2008, this might have made some kind of sense. As it is, though...

I've Married a Toddler

It's with distressing regularity that my wife reminds me that I have married a toddler. She's excitable. She has a very low tolerance for delayed gratification. She has a strong tendency to "mine?" everything. She has a tendency to break and/or lose things in her zeal to explore newly-arrived packages ...whether hers, someone else's or something that's supposed to be a shared possession. All of this was on display, today.

We bought "tickets" to a music festival that's happening near the end of spring. I place "tickets" in quotes because this festival doesn't issue traditional tickets. Instead, they issue bracelets with embedded RFIDs. The festival is multi-day and the RFID-enabled bracelets are your only means of gaining entry to the festival grounds. The festival's ticket FAQs — and the Ts&Cs on your ticket purchase-page — inform you that if you lose the bracelets, damage them in a way that renders the RFID unreadable or render the bracelet unwearable, you're fucked (my words, not theirs). While I imagine you're not actually 100% fucked, it's clear from their wordings that they'll make fixing the warned-against actions a pain in the ass.

At any rate, the parcel containing our "tickets", festival guide and assorted schwag arrived, today. Donna, being her usual, excitable self was wanting to immediately tear into it. I, however, was still in the middle of finishing my day's work. She asked if she could open it while I worked.

Given the amount I've paid for the festival "tickets", hotel, airfare, etc. plus the above caveats around the "tickets" dispositions, the prospect of letting her open the package without me was a "not gonna fucking happen" proposition. After scolding her to stop taking the package apart and to put it down and leave me to finish what I was working on (how this festival is being paid for, neh?), she opted to head over to the neighbor's house for a couple hours.

She came back a few hours later, as I was starting to do my "end of work-session" closing-tasks. She was still antsy and giving me a rushed feeling. Not something I tolerate well at any time, least of all when I'm trying to exit a work-session cleanly. So, as she started to hover, it aggravated me to the point of barking at her to wait while I closed out. She sat down on the couch, package on her lap, fidgeting ...which, since she was still in my eye-line, was continuing to aggravate me.

What she never quite seems to get is that aggravation equals distraction. Said distraction slows the speed with which I am able to do things that require concentration (like closing-out my work-session).

Finally done, I started to get up. Seeing me begin to move, she, of course, interjects with "can I open it, now?" I replied, "not yet," and stalked off to sort out the lights and get my phone's camera ready. I'm not really an "unboxing" kind of person, but I have friends that I know were wanting to see the package since they're unable to go. I also wanted picture-evidence in case anything was damaged or missing.

I started disassembling the package, taking pictures as I went. Interjections of "ooh, what's that," and "can I see that" ...and grabbing at things and throwing "metal hands" while I'm trying to take pictures ensued. While it's great that she's happy about the festival and excited, her expression of it was a bit grating while I was trying to sort out "what's what" in the packaging. Really didn't want to accidentally discard or damage anything important, so I wasn't exactly appreciating the distracting antics.

After I identified what of the now splayed-out contents were tickets and what were other things, she immediately grabbed one of the RFID bracelets. She wanted to try it on to make sure it fit. ...And for some completely unknowable reason, decided it would be a good idea to test out the cinching of one of the bracelets. FUCK!

Fortunately, she hadn't cinched it to the point that it needed to be cut off. She hadn't cinched it to the point that she couldn't get it back on once slid off. When I incredulously asked what the hell she thought she was doing fucking with the cincher, she tells me, "I wanted to make sure it would fit on my wrist".

Yeah, that was not exactly the response that I was expecting. I was a bit dumbfounded by the response, actually. Mustering what credulity I could, I replied, "you were concerned the bracelet might not fit" — presumably by being too small —, "so you tightened it??" Sheepish expression on her face was really all she had left. She babbled some further explanations, but they all made less sense than her immediately prior statements, so I couldn't quite "process" them.

At any rate, everything verified to be present (and now someowhat fucked with) and "documented" I packed the festival kit back up and stuffed it into the case I'll be packing my laptop and other critical items into. I'll have to look at it a bit later to make sure I didn't miss anything in all of the festival's documentation or the welcome material in the kit-box.

No Color, No Car

It occurs to me, I've never bought a new car that wasn't a color.


My first car was a hand-me-down. It was a grey Chevy Citation.


My second car was the the first new car that I paid for. It was a Regatta Red Nissan Pulsar NX.


My third car was a used car. I had to buy it because my, then 8 year old Nissan had suffered a financially untenable mechanical failure. I needed a car ASAP and needed it for less than the repair-costs of the Nissan. I ended up with a Charcoal Honda Civic.


My next car was a "by choice" purchase. Another Honda Civic, I selected a pearlescent Aztec Green for its color.


Thanksgiving of 1997, I was visiting family in Pennsylvania. At the time, my father was looking to get himself a new car. We stopped by a VW dealership ...that shared space with a BMW dealership. I happened to notice a Z3 in the show room. Hadn't been intending to buy a car - wasn't really even looking for one, but the color caught me. Asked to take it for a test drive. Ended up returning to DC with a (limited edition - one of 300 made globally) Dakar Yellow Z3.


When time came to replace the Z3, I decided I needed something notionally more practical. Of the many cars I tried, none really felt right ...until I took a ride in a co-worker's brand new e46 (2000 model year). He let me take it for a drive and I really liked it. I still wanted a convertible, though, but orders for such were no longer available on the 2000 model year. Put deposit down and ordered a 2001 convertible in "Techno Violet Metallic". Nine months later, it showed up and I traded in the Z3.

Six months later (and just two weeks after 9/11), it was stolen. Was able to order a replacement, but it was a 2002 model year. It arrived in late December of 2001. That's the car I'm still driving, today.


While I've purchased two other vehicles, since then - both for my wife - only one has been a non-color. She insisted on black (she's a goth and generally color-shy) for the first vehicle that we'd hoped would end up being a sprogling-hauler. At least it had (aftermarket) purple and black seats.

When it started to die in 2012, we bought a Mini. Wife, again, wanted a non-color vehicle, but I vetoed. We ended up with Chili Red (but with black "rally" stripes).

Gotta Wonder...

Ever since the shooting in Vegas, last year, any time a mass-shooting makes the news and I see various people screaming "something needs to be done", I can't help but wonder, "was the shooter's the real intent to prove that there's really nothing you can do to prevent mass shootings":

• Background investigations? Passed them.
• Use of aftermarket stuff to increase rate of fire on otherwise non-cyclic weapons? Yup.
• Using a cache of pre-loaded weapons to obviate the question of limiting magazine-sizes? Yup
• Using a cache of pre-loaded weapons to overcome the types of heating problems you encounter when you make a civilian-grade weapon operate at near-
• military fire-rates? Yup.
• Inclusion of weapons in the cache that wouldn't have been covered by a ban of weapons that *resemble* military-grade weapons? Yup.

The only real thing he "missed" - at least as far as what's made it to news outlets - was including 3D printed weapons, magazines or bump-stocks. ...He also missed out on using homemade bullets. Basically, stuff that's fairly trivially done and no amount of regulation is *ever* going to prevent (at least, not in the case of an adequately-determined malefactors). Stuff that's really only going to get easier to do as technology advances.

I mean, sure, you could try to wholly ban guns, but how well have bans on alcohol and drugs worked out over the years. And, really, that's part of the irony of the "do something" crowd: many of the same people that say "legalize drugs because prohibition just doesn't work" are among the throngs that think that either outright banning all guns or just the "particularly awful" ones will somehow magically work where previous prohibitions have failed.

Am I saying it won't cut down on the number of incidents? No. It would probably greatly cut down on the number of newsworthy incidents. Problem is, it would probably also make it so that when incidents do happen, they're far more likely to be Vegas-style ...or, come by other forms of mayhem (Boston 2013, anyone?).

The Cycle of Holiday Shopping

I like shopping from home. In looking back at the holiday shopping seasons throughout my life, I find that my 20s and early 30s were probably the real aberration in my shopping behaviors.

As a kid, I grew up in a borderline rural area. I say "borderline", because the town I grew up in was about 35,000 people ...but it was the single largest town in the county. The closest "city" was the next county over - separated from my town by a river and 30 miles of very busy interstate highway. I put quotes around city because by the time of my teen years, changing economic conditions meant that said city had shrunk below to 60,000 residents. To truly be a city, my recollection was that there needs to be 100,000 residents within an incorporated entity. Not really sure, at this point, though. I think the reason that said "city" was referred to as a city was because it happened to be the state capital. Can't have your capital not be a city!

I guess I try to say I grew up in a "borderline" rural area because I don't like to admit I grew up in BFE. However, the prevalence of Trump placards and bumper-stickers the past two Thanksgivings means that I really can't hide where I'm from. Also probably counts, in large part, why I never felt at "home" where I grew up. Mom says I chafed to get away from there from well before my teen years. I know I always felt out of place there.

Digression aside... Being in that type of area meant that, until the mall and big-box retail explosion of the 90s and early 2000s (after I'd graduated college and moved away from the region), there just wasn't a huge amount concentrated shopping. There were plenty of mom-and-pops and other little stores in each town's "down town" areas, just not the kinds of concentrated-retail that typifies the Black Friday meltdowns that seemed to become the norm in the 2000s. As a kid, Christmas season meant waiting for the Christmas catalogues to show up from Sears, JC Penny's and a couple of other, lesser outlets. When the catalogs showed up, it was always "ignore all the grown-up/practical stuff" and seek out the colorful toy-sections of the catalogues. Then dog-ear the pages containing the stuff I wanted (to make it easier for mom and dad to find) and very carefully circle the specific items desired. I place that emphasis there because there were some Christmas snafus that resulted from failure to be precise enough in marking desired items. Was mostly a grandparent problem. They meant well ...and, unlike a pair particularly harried parents, one season, never resulted in a complete "I thought you were buying the presents this year" gaff.

After college, I moved away from home to find work and, frankly, to finally escape the chafing confines of where I grew up. This seemed to coincide with the major rise in destination shopping (90s was when Mall of America became famous, after all). It meant slogging through traffic to get to malls whose parking lots were designed for the rest of the year. It meant dealing with crowds of people who didn't really seem to have any particular place to be, just "out". Lastly, it also meant waiting in line for registers that, like the parking structures, were mostly designed for the rest of the year.

I've been working in IT, to one degree or another, pretty much my entire adult life. I've worked for a couple of ISPs (one that was an early hosting-services provider for e-commerce) and companies that provided support services for them ...and for online retail companies. So, early on, I was aware of possibilities for avoiding malls. And, as they came more into my price-range and stocked more of the stuff I was interested in, I switched to shopping almost exclusively through them. I wasn't really concerned about contributing to the death of small businesses - as, by that time, Walmart and the big-box stores had already put most of them on the endangered species list, any way. I was mostly concerned about avoiding the cranky throngs ("merry fucking Christmas!"), the traffic and everything that makes the holiday run-up unpleasant.

With the backlash against Black Friday nonsense - and the realization that it's kind of silly to try to force shoppers into doing a year's worth of business in the waning hours of the Thanksgiving holiday - it's managing to become even less onerous. And, while I've usually waited until the "hmm... If I do the overnight option, will it still get here in time" or the "if I ship ahead, will it be there when we get there" was a real concern, this year I actually dispensed with things early. Everything I'm buying is bought, already, as of this writing (and, I have enough time that I may have actually paid it all off before 2017 turns to 2018).

No Place To Call Home

I grew up in a small town in Pennsylvania. Throughout my growing up, I chafed to get away. It never really felt like "home" to me.

To be fair, I don't know that any place has ever felt like "home" ...at least not in the sense that I hear other people describe their feelings of "home". For me, places are mostly more or less alien. Some places have people that are important to me. Even a few places I've been lucky enough to travel to, I've felt almost immediately comfortable.

On FB, I have connections to several people I grew up with. I guess the biggest thing that the POTUS Trump era has really done is shown me part of why I never really felt at home in the town I grew up. The people I grew up with who all sought lives elsewhere - typically cities - and the people who never left exhibit quite the dichotomy. It feels like I have far more in common with those who left (and the ones who left but came back for various reasons) than the ones who stayed behind.

I don't post on FB much any more - mostly comments on things people have posted on their walls. When reading through others' comments, I pretty much never have to click on people's profiles to see if they are a "one who left" or a "never left". It's pretty much immediately evident in the tone of their commentary ...and it reminds me of why I left. It reminds me of why, when I reach an age where I'm no longer working and no longer able to afford to live where I do, I won't move back "home" but, instead, try to find a more affordable place that isn't quite so alien as places like where I grew up.

Impacts of Loss

Found this link...

Every time I've lost a dog, it's been a complete gut-punch. More than when grandparents died. More, even, than when my dad died.


For me, I think it comes down to the responsibility component combined with the "they can't talk" problem. I wasn't responsible for the lives of my relatives. Even if I had been, that responsibility would likely have come in the context of caring for someone in decline - that the trajectory was known and the responsibility was simply to help them to the best end that medicine, society and finances allow. With dogs... There's so many places you can feel guilty. Did I put them down too soon? Did I do enough for them? Did I wait too long to put them down. Did trying to help them just put them through more pain? Did I do enough to help them through what has to be a frightening process?


Dogs can't talk. You can try to read them, but it's still, in the end, just a guess. When people talk about "wouldn't it be great if pets could talk?" I always answer, "no, I don't really want to try to have a conversation with my dog. What I _would_ like, though, is to know what their state of wellbeing was - how best I could help them feel better or have them ask me for comfort or help letting them go."

Daig Noise

Interesting progression in dog ownership.
 

Our first two dogs were, from a barking standpoint, very quiet. Lana earned the nicknames "Lana-moo", "Moo-cow" and just "Moo" because she liked to conversationally-vocalize in a manner that was somewhat bovine (obviously). Puckett was generally too goofy to bark or even growl. Only very rarely would he alert-bark or warn-bark - basically, just when he thought there was a threat I hadn't seen or that I had reacted to but that he thought needed further discouragement. Otherwise, his vocalizations mostly came when he saw other dogs that he wanted to play ...and then his low-pitched voice became an embarrassing mewl.


After Lana passed (euthanasia b/c of a combination of cancer and a degenerative spinal-condition), we got Cira. Cira was generally a very low-key dog. There were things that _did_ excite her to the point of actual exuberance, but it was a _very_ quiet exuberance. Her expressiveness was far more physical than audible. Her most-audible expressions were her expressions of gustatory delight - a very hearty belch after wolfing down breakfast. Her entire bearing before eating in the morning was one of, "OH MY GOD: _BREAKFAST TIME". The daily-BRACK would only come after she would come flying back into the living room and launching herself onto my couch. Usually, the belch would be followed by a bullie-grin ...framed by specks of errant rice stuck to her snout.

After Pucket passed (euthenasia b/c of very aggressive cutaneous lymphoma that spread to his lungs), we got Lady.  Lady... is the first dog that we had tendencies towards barkiness. She can be conversationally vocal in a manner similar to Lana. However, a lot of her vocalization comes as excited barking: get her spun up through playing and playful growling becomes playful barking. She will also bark when we leave the house and don't leave the TV on (at least the conversational audio) for her. If someone knocks on the front door or rings the doorbell, she also barks. Other than that, though — and if you don't count her snoring and brachycephalic snorting — she's fairly quiet.

After Cira passed (euthanasia b/c of severe, suddenly-manifesting end-stage renal-failure), we got Kaiya. Unlike the previous dogs who were all bullie/bullie mixes (Cira being the only "pure" bullie - a staffy), Kaiya is a bullie-mix that isn't all bullie. She's a bullie/lab mix. She's also considerably barkier than any of our other dogs had been. If she hears a noise, she's gonna bark at it. If it's a noise from out-of-sight, even if she's hearing the same noise multiple times in a given timespan, she'll bark each time she hears it. For example, my wife was just out in the front-foyer's closet, organizing it to store some new stuff in it. Each time Donna's activities made bumping-sound, Kaiya would bark. I love our nubby-dog (recently had to have her tail docked due to "happy-tail" related infection) to death, but the frequent alerting is maddening - especially the re-alerting.

The Happiness Penalty

Our most recent canine addition to our family - Kaiya - suffers from happy tail. If you've never heard of it, it's what happens when you have a dog who's so emphatically waggy that they injure themselves whacking their tail into things. The first time we came home to a blood-covered wall, the vet advised us to get her tail docked.


She's a lab/pitbull mix and loves to go swimming. She loves to play fetch in the local river with her floaty toys. We were reticent to get the procedure done during river season, so we kept her tail wrapped to protect it.


Unfortunately, Kaiya developed a tendency to pull the wrapping off - exposing her to re-injury. We had been addressing this with a comfy-cone. Unfortunately, because she's still quite young, she's also quite flexible. Sometime Friday night, she'd managed to pull the protective bandage off - in spite of the cone - and had chewed the end of her tail. Sometime between Saturday night and Sunday afternoon, where she'd chewed got infected and painful. Took her to visit the vet for an emergency visit. The wound was irrigated and she was given pain meds and antibiotics ...and put on today's schedule for tail-docking.

Just got back from dropping her off at the vet for surgery sometime, today. I know she needs the procedure done - especially since it got infected. But it still feels like I'm penalizing her for being a very happy dog. Of course, the fact that it's now an urgent procedure and she was in pain from the infection compounds the "I'm a bad dog-parent" feeling because I wasn't able to protect her from herself well enough.

Yeah... I would have been a mess each time my kid hurt themselves had we actually been able to have kids.

Silver Linings

As I sit here, watching Fight Club for the nine millionth time, a thought rings through my head. For whatever reason, Fight Club has always had a resonance for me that I never really understood. Very little about it has any direct connection to my life. But, I sit a little longer, and eventually the movie gets to the scene about Tyler's job as a projectionist. As the scene concludes, it occurs to me, "it's probably a good thing that I have the kind of epilepsy that's controllable by medicine."

I expressed this thought to my wife. Initially, she didn't see where I was going with the thought until I explained it to her.


Let me preface by saying: I've never particularly considered myself to be a nice person. Indeed, when a co-worker recently told me that one of the new hires was talking shit about my particularness for writing, I responded back to him that I'm not trying to win a popularity-contest. When it comes to work, I'm there to get shit done, and get it done well. If my standards annoy some people, so be it. Again, not seeing myself as being nice, I feel free to do things that don't align with being a "nice guy".


At any rate, the explanation. I point out to her that having medicinally-manageable epilepsy meant that I always sort of had to worry about retaining (financial) access to medicine and the specialists that prescribe them. Epilepsy medications can be ridiculously expensive (one medication I was on, at one point, was $1500/month). The easiest way to do so being to have the kind of employment that typically includes health insurance. Being hirable to those types of jobs generally means not being able to engage in the more anti-social thoughts that randomly enter my brain and rattle around.

Hearing that explanation, my wife laughed. But, she also agreed with the line of reasoning.

It's a Racket, I Tells Ya

Even when the whole IT certifications thing started, it felt like a scam. But then the certification-sellers (and, not to be unduly uncharitable, but all that the vast majority are doing is selling false assurances) did away with "forever" certifications and replaced them with expiring ones. While you can argue that there's validity to skills being "perishable", most of what's certified is "you either know and have internalized the principles or you havent". While specific symptoms and scenarios may evolve, the underlying principles are generally fairly static. That said, a 3-5 year validity window isn't awful, just inconvenient. You drop down to 2 years (the guilty certification-players know who they are) and you've gotten uncomfortably close to doing to certification what has happened with password-expiration policies.

To illustrate, one set of certifications I have has a two year lifetime. Six months before they're due to expire, the certifying authority starts sending out, "you need to re-test to stay certified - do it early and we'll cut you a break on pricing". Here's the thing, though: if I do the early re-test thing, the next chunk of 24 months' validity isn't tacked on to the end of the soon-to-end 24 months. No, it starts the day you're tests are verified as having been passed. So, if I retest early, I've sacrificed up six months of that 24-month validity (i.e., up to 1/3 of that already short validity is pissed away). So, yeah, "I saved money by re-testing early".

It's like, "dear certification sellers: when my logins start getting that 'you've got 14 days till your password expires' thing, my response is generally, 'good to know: I'll change it in 14 days'. Not having stackable re-certification creates the same kind of outcome."

Why Have a Car

When I see commercials for new cars and they're talking about the monthly payments, they just don't make sense to me. It's like, ok, your monthly payment is less than $200. Great. But your down payment (on a rental?? I mean, they're not calling it a "deposit", presumably for a reason) works out to more than a year's worth of monthly payments ...and the lease-term on some of them is now down to only two years. Meaning that, to get that $200/month term, you're paying three years' worth of money and committing yourself to paying down-payments every other year.

Of course, the above ignores that the amount of mileage you're allowed to put on your rental is trifling (unless you commute the way I do)? And, if you live in a state like I do, just because you don't own the vehicle doesn't mean you're absolved of the tax-liability for the vehicle (VA has "personal property tax" that you have to pay whether you own or lease) Seriously: why do people lease any more?? I just don't understand the financial advantage of it.

Granted, the purchase options seem kind of silly, now, too. When I was first buying cars, typical notes were still three years long - though four-year notes were starting to become the norm. However, it seems like we're now into terms that are six years long ...and the typical warranties are lagging the notes' lifetimes even more than they used to.

And car-makers are wondering why those damned millennials have less interest in cars than previous generations. I mean, if I were forming my buying habits during the current market, I probably would have low interest in owning or leasing a car.

Pricing Complaints

With Whole Foods being in the news from the Amazon announcement, I'm seeing all of the old "Whole Foods is overpriced" rants being re-hashed. Maybe that's true in other areas of the country. Dunno. All I know is that at the ones closest to me, they're price competitive when you do actual apples-to-apples price-comparisons. What I've found, price-wise, is:

• if they carry something that is sold elsewhere (e.g., a "regular" grocery store, they're price-competitive - often beating Giant or Safeway on those items).
• if they carry a local product from, say, a farmer/producer that sells in the local farm market, their prices are the same (unless the seller at the farmers market intentionally undercuts Whole Foods' pricing
• they're a skosh higher than, say, Total Beverage on same-item-pricing for wines and beers
• they're about the same as Wegmans on items from the dairy-case, seafood counter and butcher's counter
• You get positively KILLED on things like prepared foods (though, the ingredients on one of their sandwiches tends to be different than the ones you'll find a Potbelly's or Jimmy Johns ...and in a completely different class than your local Subway)
• You get killed on vitamins/supplements ...but they're usually carrying brands/options for which there's no meaningful point of comparison

The problem ísn't that they're overcharging for what they carry, it's that their inventory tends to be weighted towards "premium" options. Complaining about Whole Foods' prices seems a lot like whining that the pair of hand-crafted full-grain leather shoes you saw at Nieman Marcus are so much more expensive than the machine-made "Genuine Leather" knockoffs at Payless.

Note: I made the shoe comparison b/c it's fair (see Leather Grades article)

Freaking Campers

I only use the desk at my "official" work-site 1-2 days a week. On the days I do come in, I arrive early (before 0600) and leave early (by 14:00).Some people assume that, because they never see me here, I don't actually use this desk. So, if they don't have an assigned desk (or don't like the one they have) they'll start camping at my desk.

It's always kind of funny when some camper comes rolling to my desk first thing in the(ir) morning and find me sitting at the desk. They get this butt-hurt look on their face ...probably b/c they realize "shit, now I need to find some other workspace to borrow, today". It's really great when they ask, "is this desk going to be available soon." It's like, "uh, no fucker: this is my desk - I'll be using it for as long as I want to use it."

When it comes to spaces I use, I have spartan tendencies, to begin with. That it feels like we get moved every so often to accommodate the whims of "the powers that be," I don't feel especially compelled to violate those spartan tendencies.

My boss told me, "you need to make your space look a bit more lived in. That will discourage campers." I need to get a couple of my longer-haired, female friends - preferably ones with kids - and have them dress up "sister-wives" style - and then go for studio photos. It would be great to leave a "family" portrait in my cube that looked like I was a fundamentalist LDS.

Musical Memery...

For the past few days when I've logged into Facebook to see what friends are up to, there've been more and more people participating in a "10 bands" thing. As good as my memory is, it's hard for me to remember bands that I haven't seen:

• First couple years after moving to DC, my one housemate was buddies with the staff at the old 930 club. Meant we saw bands a couple nights per week for 18 months - all for the price of bar-tab and tips.
• After I moved out of there, I had a job with SGI that had me on the road most of the 22mo that I worked there. Saw bands in venues all over the US.
• Somewhere late in my tenure with SGI, I met several event promoters in DC. In exchange for hosting their websites for them (I had an old SPARCserver co-located at a local ISP), I got into pretty much any show I'd want to see for free. As a result, much of my 20s was spent in rock bars, small nightclubs, larger indoor venues and the very occasional pavillion and arena shows. Only stadium shows I went to were festivals (several Lollapaloozas and couple Ozzfests - including the 2000 one in San Jose).

So, it's hard for me to pick bands I haven't seen ...that probably aren't immediately obvious. It's only further complicated by the fact that, in recent years, I've been making more of an effort to try to get out and see live acts, again. And the acts I'm seeing now are radically different than the ones of my pre-40s.

Opportunities in Loss

I used my blog to help me work through the process of loss. Being a pet owner - particularly when you tend to get pets via rescues - means that dealing with loss is an inevitability. It sucks. It's like a kick in the guts that keeps on giving long after pet's final breath has been drawn.

That said, I have been quite fortunate. Thus far, I've generally been in the position to open my home to a new pet when one of the incumbents has died. While we opted not to replace the cats I'd had for seventeen years, we've replaced each of the prior dogs that has passed. Most recently, after Cira's passing, we got Kaiya — the black dog in the video, below:

Lady (the white-headed dog) has displayed some iffiness with new dogs - at least while we've had her out walking on-leash. Kaiya was described to us by her rescue organization as being a mostly chill dog, but had some on-leash iffiness of her own. Fortunately, we were able to meet her in a scenario where both dogs were able to be introduced and monitored off-leash (they were leashed, but the leashes were dropped ...available for use if something went sideways). The introduction was promising, so, we returned the following week to make her ours.

As you can see in the video, the two dogs seem to be getting on well. They rough-house, but that's bullie play-style. If you knew Lady's barks, you'd be able to hear that she's play-barking throughout the entire video. As I write this, both dogs are laying curled up with each other on the couch-pillow next to me. It's very warm. It's also very happy-making.

18 Springs

Eighteen springs ago, I selected two kittens from this bundle to be my companions for 17 years. The kitten at the far left came to us as and remaind "Bella" - she was the breeder's pick of the litter. The kitten to the far right became known to us a "Grumbles" - a name that his actions and demeanor demanded (I don't even remember what the breeder had named him as he name changed the first time I fed him, it changed to Grumbles).

I do wonder if either of the siblings outlived my pair or even lasted as long as my pair. I know that Jagger - the one crawling on top of the pile - was the last adopted because he had some early health issues. Never knew the name of the fourth kitten as she was already promised to another before I selected Bella (and came back for Grumbles).

Candy Nightmare

With Easter looming, a local veterinary service sent out a notice to remind people, "don't let your pets have chocolate"

Picture Not Directly Related

We've never intentionally given any of our pets candy - particularly not chocolate - Easter or otherwise. That said ...We'd once had a candy incident with our first pair of bullies.

We'd had to go run a quick errand and had penned the dogs up like we usually did for such absences. We were gone maybe twenty minutes. This time, however, the female decided to break them out of their pen and go after some "low-hanging fruits". We came home to find both dogs sitting happily on the couch, looking at us like, "you forgot to lock us up - we figured it was cool to sit here on the couch."

Then we found the shredded, empty box that had previously been filled with dark-chocolate truffles. A small distance away, we found the remnants of the bag that had about 1.5lbs of a mixed-assortment of jelly beans. Closish to that, we found the remnants of a bag that had been full of dried apricots. All three had been up on the counters. Amusingly, the bag of bison jerky that had been sitting on the ottoman had been left untouched.

Called the vet to get the opinion on whether to bring the dogs down (had to bring both since neither dog had obvious signs of having consumed the goodies and bother were scampering about happily). Vet said that because they were dark chocolate, we needed to bring them down for ipecac, charcoal and sedatives.

Turns out - after a *very* colorful purge - that only one of the dogs had been bad. Even so, both dogs had to suffer the purge-protocol because there wasn't a good way to ensure that both hadn't partaken without the purge.

Both dogs were unscathed by the experience (purging was less than 45 minutes after food-consumption). I always felt bad for the innocent dog, though.