Sunday, May 9, 2010

Digging In The Archives

So, I've been on a personal archeology kick, lately. Somehow, I've actually managed to keep ahold of shit I wrote, online, in the late 90s and early 2000s. Ironically, one of the ones I found was written when I was going through another dredging...

Apparently, I wrote (or at least archived - because the file dates might have been changed when moving files) the following in summer of 2002...


Just dredged up some notebooks I found in my move. One of them had a page labeled 5-23-94. Guess it was part of a collection of thoughts that I was trying to jot down. Any way, that entry was on "potential."

    It's kinda funny, the things that are said to you in life. Many of them sound quite innocent, maybe even complimentary. If you think about them, however, many of them are quite insulting.
    As a ferinstance, when people tell you, "you've got potential." Now,I've heard this many times. In fact, I've heard it too many times. Today, though, something about it struck a chord. Think about it. What does telling someone they have potential really say? You may mean it in the nicest way possible. You truly see something in the other person that even that person may not know. Maybe you're trying to encourage them and help them by pointing out something they don't know. You may be trying to help them be the best that they could possibly be.
    But, think about what you're actually saying. At some level or another, you're saying that they don't measure up - measure up to what you think they could or should be. You're saying, "you should be better." Nice sentiment, eh?
    Perhaps it's just me overanalyzing things again.

So, in 2002, I found something I wrote in 1994. Reading it feels like something I could have written last week - not sixteen years ago. Does this mean that, even as I age, I'm not really progressing? Or does it simply mean that I'm fairly  consistent in my outlook on life and my thought processes.

Don't go digging if you're afraid of what you might find. :p